Writing has been nonexistent for the past six weeks. I didn’t mean to stop and I wasn’t trying to lose my momentum. I wrote my way through January, 500 words at a time. That month I only missed a couple of days, but I set aside blogging during the process. I guess I needed time to write privately and figure out the obstacles life had thrown at me.
Sometimes I can work through challenges and continue to write. But this time felt different. I was overwhelmed and I couldn’t keep up with daily tasks and weekly responsibilities. So I left the blog for a while.
A few times I thought, “Oh, maybe I’ll try to post a story today. Or link up with the Five Minute Friday community again.” And I quickly let the thought go.
I couldn’t find the words.
I didn’t know how to continue.
My body and brain were worn out.
I had lost a sense of direction.
And fears were growing again.
I have been stuck before. But this time my body was also against me. Tiredness took over physically, emotionally, and spiritually. My motivation to push ahead disappeared for a while.
It has been hard to see everyday joys and remember to live boldly and bravely. When I stopped writing, I also put away courage. I forgot God is with me no matter what. I may not always feel His presence or see His good gifts in my path.
Yes, I am still tired and in the middle of a rest season, but it is time to keep going and pick up the pieces of my story I do know, the parts I can understand. Slowly my eyes are opening and my heart is aware. I am starting to see again. I have caught sight of the joys around me.
*******
My nephew came to visit at the beginning of last week. He is young and so full of life. As he ran around the house exploring, he scattered joy around every corner. As he spoke our names, my parents and I gladly answered. And as he chatted the hours away, we listened, joined the conversation, and taught him new words.
Those two days with my nephew stirred up reminders of God’s goodness and I am thankful. I was even inspired to write the following poem, especially after I missed the sounds of my nephew breaking the silence of an ordinary day.
“little feet”
little feet
pitter patter
taptaptap
on the wood floors
little voice
jibber jabber
chit chat
with every new word
little hands
flitter flutter
up down up
to any familiar face
little boy
teeter totter
runrunrun
until the end of day
Laura what a challenging winter you have had. I wish only a warm spring to revitalise your creative soul and your body is free from weary . I love this line………he ran around the house exploring, he scattered joy around every corner. scattering joy…kids will do that to you and Im glad you recognised it as something precious. Your words are meant to be on the page. WORDS from your heart can lift those in need. Just start with one word, then another and another and before you know it you have written a book of inspirational moments.
Thank you, Kath! It is a blessing to be around kids any day. 🙂 One word at a time…yes. I am so glad spring is finally here. And thanks for sharing your encouraging heart from the other side of the world.
Dear Laura, I’m so glad you started to write again and sharing your thoughts just the way they reach your page. That’s the best way when we don’t have enough energy to edit or think in a long term way. And I’m also glad you found the glimmer of light we are looking for in the gloominess. A child, a friend helpful for awakening the love in our heart, the spirit that helps us move on again. I believe you’ll find ways to balance rest and momentum to move forward now and come back to the You you want to be. Much love to you. <3
Thanks so much for reading and leaving these kind words, Lotta! It can be hard to keep posting, but I hope to hold on to the glimmers in my days and faithfully follow my calling to write. 🙂 Fast or slow, we all keep going! Hope your writing is going WELL.
Laura, those overwhelming times are so tough. Tough to know when to rest and when to push through. When to let go and when to hold on. How to find the right bits to write. How much is enough. Take it bit by bit. Rest where it helps, and write a little at a time. I’ve missed you!
Christine! Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. 🙂 It’s rough to navigate these seasons, but you’re right — every bit of writing adds up and thankfully I’m ready to pick up the pieces. Because I am a writer! (I’ve missed you, and the community, too!)
Laura, thank you for your honesty and the courage to put your words out there. We all need to be reminded to keep writing and encouraged to go ahead and publish some of what we write.
And thank you, Kaye, for your words! It is encouraging to know we are all on this writing journey. 🙂 The ups and downs, good weeks and not-so-good weeks. Somehow we push forward. Happy writing to you!
“When I stopped writing, I also put away courage.” I can so relate to that,Laura. Love your poem.
Thanks, Eileen! It’s funny how much bravery comes as we continue to write. Remember Sara Bareilles’ “Brave”? I discovered the song after you posted it one time. I often want to play it on repeat. 😉 Hope you are well!
I’m still loving that song too, Laura! So good.